Articles for Seniors
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The elder and the parrot
An elder man buys a pet parrot and brings him home. But the parrot starts insulting him and gets really nasty, so the man picks up the parrot and tosses him into the freezer to teach him a lesson. He hears the bird squawking for a few minutes, but all of a sudden the parrot is quiet. The man opens the freezer door, the parrot walks out, looks up at him and says, “I apologize for offending you, and I humbly ask your forgiveness.”
The man says, “Well, thank you. I forgive you.”
The parrot then says, “If you don’t mind my asking, what did the chicken do?”
*Source: http://www.swapmeetdave.com/Humor/Seniors.htm
read comments (0)Being fit at age 40 and above
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Are you considering alternative medicine?
Alternative medicine can be used in replacement or as an addition to standard medicines. Many senior citizens also take alternative medicines as an addition to their medical treatments.
Here are some precautions just in case you are planning to get some alternate medicine.
1. Check your doctor about the treatment or therapy that you are interested in.
2. Look for information about the product over the internet.
3. Consult scientific journals.
4. Talk to people who have used the product.
5. Research for scientific studies about the product.
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You are totally there
This one just got off from an e-mail that my grandmother sent me. It’s pretty funny and totally true. I hope you like this. Enjoy!
If you remember when TV
Used to be black and white
You find you’re getting broader
But your shrinking in your height
If before you go to bed
Your teeth go in a jar
And you forget what your doing
Before you’ve gone too far
If your bladder gets you up
In the middle of the night
You get up in the morning
And you look an awful sight
If you’re not breaking hearts
You’re breaking wind instead
When you’d sooner stay at home
And watch TV in bed
Then my friend I say to you
You’ve finally reached the stage
That is what is called
The golden years of age
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Food allergies
I can barely remember the time when my family went out to have dinner. We do this at least once a month. My grandfather was still alive back then and had allergies on seafoods.
There are a lot of seniors who are having the same problems as well. It is true that dining out as risks but food allergies do not mean that you have to stay home and be safe.
Here are some suggestions that would help reduce the risk of an allergic reaction while eating out.
1. Always review the ingredient list of the menu items where you are eating.
2. Tell your server about your food allergy and ask for some information on particular dishes. If your server is not really sure, ask the manager or the chef.
3. Do not eat from buffets or order family style dishes because the foods may be contaminated by utensils or other foods.
4. Stay away from fried foods. The same oil may have been used to fry other dishes.
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The memory school joke
Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening just as they have done for the past 50 years.
Gus, the elder, had been having problems remembering what cards were what, and usually needed help from his wife. At the end of the card game Red said to Gus, “You did very good tonight. You didn’t need any help at all. Why is that?”
Gus replied, “Why, ever since my wife sent me to that memory school, I haven’t had any problems at all.”
“Memory school? What memory school?”
Gus thought for a moment, “Oh, what’s that flower that’s red with thorns? A really pretty flower . . . ”
“A rose?” asked Red.
“Yeah, that’s it!” Gus turned to his wife and mumbled, “Hey, Rose! What’s the name of that memory school you sent me to?”
http://humorvault.tripod.com/senior/senior_3.html
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