Seniors Site

This must be the scariest part of caregiving – when you need to make end-of-life decisions. While it may be the last decision you’ll ever make for your senior which basically means you will also be free to go back living a normal life, it also means that it will only be a matter of time before you and your beloved senior part ways which is quite saddening especially if you have already forged a bond with your senior.
It helps if your senior has already made plans or was able to cover some points clearly before he or she reaches this point however, most seniors don’t plan things like this even if they feel it coming. It must be the feeling of accepting death, that when you actually plan for it, it becomes more real and soon. If you are the primary caregiver and the one to make end-of-life decisions, you might want to encourage your senior to plan ahead – just don’t push it if they are not ready.
The decision should from your senior as it is the only way they will be able to come up with their real wishes. Try to understand that they might have fears and doubts not to mention the fact that they are planning their own end-of-life situations which, if you come to think of it, is quite freaky. Try to understand their fears and if you can, allay it. If it helps, ask their doctors and perhaps someone whom they trust and respect, to talk to them and assure them thus helping them arrive to an acceptable decision. If there are people your senior should be talking to, they would be: family members, doctors, religious and financial advisers and their lawyer.
At this point, your senior should be able to assign a person who will make end-of-life decisions for them when time comes, if that person is not you. This person should be able to efficiently deal with all aspects of the senior’s end-of-life wishes such as the financial aspect and most especially health care. In terms of health care, it will help if your senior will be able to specify what type of medical treatments they prefer to be done if a certain situation calls for it, and if there are treatments they would rather skip. Aside from medical treatments, your senior should also mention if they wish to be still given life support even if their breathing or heart stops or if they are already brain dead. Ask them if they wish to stay at the hospital or would rather be cared for at home if they are terminally ill. Lastly, if they die, would they rather have the family decide what to do with them or if they have their own wishes.

Traveling is fun especially if you do it with people you love the most. Travels and holidays are always a welcome break no matter what age we are in; kids love them for the adventure traveling represents; moms and dads for non-working days and of course, for seniors who badly need a change of scenery. Furthermore, travels are a good way to bond with your loved-ones and make some more memories for the whole family to cherish.
Special trips with your mom or dad are indeed fun and will be remembered for the rest of your life. Do this while they can still enjoy the trip and none the later. It will be more fulfilling if you prevent minor, as well as major, inconveniences from happening during your trip. Here are some tips on how to plan a trip with your senior.
· Ask your senior where they would want to go. If you must know, a lot of enthusiasm always beats whatever chronic condition your senior might be experiencing today! On the other hand, if you “drag” them to nowhere land where they don’t even want to be in, there will surely be 101 aches and pains your senior’s body will come up with.
· Necessary physical ability. Your dad wants to visit China, particularly THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA. Unless he is a lifelong runner of some sorts with will and endurance of a steel, surely you know there’s no way he will be able to endure the long walks and steep climbs. When planning trips and activities, make sure that all necessary physical requirements will be met by your senior.
· Plan expenses ahead of time. Small things like who picks up the tab for dinner tonight or who buys that pearl necklace for mom can be worked out during the trip however, bigger expenses like air fare and accommodations should be planned just so nobody would be surprised – or stressed – come billing time.
· Secure proper documentations. Such as your senior’s prescriptions signed by their doctors or perhaps that medical journal they have been meticulously keeping. You might need them while on trip while I pray not.
· Pack practical. Between you and your senior, you have a lot to keep track of, you certainly don’t need any more. Pack light and pack only those you know you will be needing during the trip. Those you can easily buy can be left behind.
· Safety and security should come first. While it is fun to conquer an unknown territory, you won’t be needing that extra uncertainty while travelling with your senior. Save the “devil in you” for next time.

Dementia fuelled tantrums can be so trying and it is not impossible for caregivers to just snap or feel defeated. Whether they are directed to you or to no one in particular, you as the caregiver should be the one to diffuse or be on top of the situation always. Do take note that it is common for seniors with dementia to have tantrums and sudden outburst. It is also common for them to be agitated or to be aggressive about something even if the trigger is near non-existent.

Below are some tips for caregivers on how to handle dementia tantrums:
Stay calm. If this is your first time to encounter such outburst, try to stay calm and try to sooth your senior. If all else fails, try to calm yourself as it is the only way you can assess and handle the situation more effectively.

* Divert attention. Try, if you can, to divert your senior’s attention. While this may not work always, it’s worth a try. You can try to give them a task – something that will drive their attention away from the source of their frustration/outburst.
* Be a traffic controller. If your senior has managed to make a scene, try to move people along while explaining that your senior has dementia. Having people stare at your senior will only agitate your senior more thus prolonging the outburst.
* Find the source as quickly as possible. Surely there is a source for such an outburst. You should be able to find out the cause of the outburst and be able to eliminate it from your senior’s site.
* Remember the things that are most likely to upset them and avoid these things like a plague. While it won’t be easy to pinpoint exactly what upsets your senior thus eliminating the possibility of a future meltdown, knowing what disturbed your senior in the past is a good starting point.
* Get to know your senior’s condition more. Understanding dementia as well as your senior’s level or degree with regard to their condition will tell you what activities are best suited for your senior and what are the things you need to avoid. For example, if one day you find yourself unable to remember the word for a certain color in a color game, wouldn’t it be so frustrating, you would want to lash out on anyone within range? When you know or at least, have been monitoring your senior closely, you would know their limitations thus be bale to avoid activities that may cause a meltdown.
* Medications can help. A person with dementia is most likely to develop depression and anxiety disorders, for which medications can help. Be sure to contact and consult their doctor for this option.

No matter how hard you remind your senior that smoking can kill, they will still – and stubbornly – do it. You know why? It is because they believe that when they reach a certain age, they can do whatever they please since they will die soon anyway. What they don’t know though is that smoking actually lessens their quality of life which means that the time they should be up and running chasing their grandkids could easily be a life too tired and breathless to get up the couch. While it is true that we will all die anyway, wouldn’t it be nicer if we go with much cleaner lungs?

Do note too that five years of not smoking is equivalent to years saved from having any smoke-related diseases such as lung problems and even cancer. There are immediate effects when you stop smoking such as marked improvement in senses of taste and smell. Your breathing is more likely to become easier. Best of all, you are doing the world a whole lot of favor by not polluting it any further. Most doctors advise their seniors to stop smoking because smoking can aggravate whatever disease your senior might be having right now and it goes without saying that it prevents a doctor from giving you the right diagnosis for your condition if the patient is still smoking.

One way of quitting is going cold turkey although this method has uncomfortable withdrawal symptoms that your senior may not like. Are they even ready for this? If you would like to get your senior to stop smoking, the decision should first come from his own self than forcing them to do it. As you may know, if you force them to quit they will just end up sneaking a stick or two when you’re not looking.

Preparation is very important if you would like your senior to quite smoking. There is no better way to prepare them for what’s ahead than bringing them to the nearest health clinic which specializes in smoking or lung care and have them prepped by a professional. This way, your senior will have all the information they need firsthand.

It is also important to give them all the support they need when they eventually decided on quitting. Needless to say, you should stop smoking too if you are to preach about non-smoking lifestyle. They to remind them, if you feel they are slipping into smoking again, what they would be missing and why they are doing it in the first place. Discouraging others from smoking when your senior is around will also help.

I couldn’t stress enough how dangerous it is for seniors to commit medication mistakes. However, if you juggle five or more kinds of medication a day, it is not impossible to slip once in a while – even your caregiver can slip, if he or she is not too careful of what they are giving you. It is important to note that medication mistakes may not only land you in an emergency room, it can even kill you!
If managing several meds a day, you might want to get systematic about it. This way, you’ll have a “system” to fall back into if your memory and eyes failed you. Below are some more tips on how to avoid medication mistakes:
· Illegible prescription. I personally don’t depend on my prescription alone; I Google things first before actually buying my medications. This is because, every now and then, I stumble upon a prescription with a really bad doctor’s scrawl, it was barely readable. You can skip the Google part by asking your doctor to write down what the drug is for right beside the prescribed drug. This way, the pharmacist won’t be confused.
· Bad drug interactions. Each drug has their own side effects thus when mixing a drug or two, it is possible that they won’t interact positively with each other. The best thing to do is to always take with you a list of medications you are currently taking whenever you consult a doctor and show them your list if they need to prescribe a drug for you. Also, observe yourself on first few days upon taking the new medication to gauge if you are having a bad drug interaction.
· Oversedation. Most drugs have sedative effects such as drowsiness, sleepiness or dizziness. When you take a drug with this kind of effect then you take another with the same kind of effect, then you boost their sedation effect which is really bad for your nervous system.
· Wrong dosage for your ideal requirement. There are three things you need to take note of when receiving a prescription note: the name of the medication, dosage and frequency of use. These three you need to get exactly right each and every time. Moreover, you need to really examine the medication you just bought from the pharmacy to determine if you got the right drug name and dosage.
· Drinking while under medication. You know better than to mix drugs with alcohol right? While there are some drugs safe enough to take and drink afterward, most are not so to be on the safer side, just don’t drink alcohol.
· Different brand names, same generic name. Please take some time to examine your medications and read/compare generic names. It may be doctor A gave you brand A then doctor B gave you brand B although they have the same generic name, if this happens, it only means you’re taking twice the amount of meds you need.

Indeed home safety is important, however, when caring for a senior suffering from Alzheimer’s disease, it can get doubly important since you have to anticipate situations that are usually not normal in a household. It can get a little stressful especially during your first few weeks on the job and quite frustrating too. To alleviate stress and prevent emergency situations from happening as well, you need all the help you can get most especially from the place where you too are going to spend much of your time together: your home.
When preparing your home for a senior with Alzheimer’s disease, you need to have a lot of foresight. Assess and anticipate situations just like you would when preparing your home for a baby but this time, you also have to consider their size and age. Armed with a notebook to jot down your observations, go over your home and take note of the things you think you need to change or adjust such as that rug that refuses to stay at one place or your spotless tiled bathroom.

· Take out hazardous materials you have been keeping such as cleaning agents, bleach, etc under the sink. Better to store them outside the house or in a part of your house wherein your senior cannot access. If this is not an option then try installing locks on your kitchen cabinet.
· Hide sharp objects and just about anything that can cause bodily harm such as knives, bottle opener, etc. Furthermore, remove anything that looks like food such as fruit-shaped plastics for display as these things can easily confuse a senior with Alzheimer’s disease.
· Install monitors around home. Of course, you don’t have to be all blatant about it instead, discreetly install monitors where your senior is most likely to be left alone such as their bedroom. This will also allow you to do other things inside of home while they are sleeping or not needing immediate attention.
· Be especially aware of electrical units with dials, particularly that of your heating devices. As much as possible, your water heater should be monitored by you when used. Same goes for electric blankets and heating pads.
· Avoid clear glass at all cost. A person, even without Alzheimer’s, can easily be confused by a clear glass, thinking that there is nothing that separates two parts of the house. This usually causes ugly accidents with lots of blood. To avoid this from happening, try sticking decals on clear glass so that your senior will have their point of reference.

If I know how to make a caregiver’s life easier, then I would definitely share it to the world – and without reservations. However, caregiving is never an easy task. It requires your all and honestly, there’s too much emotion at play in caregiving especially if the senior you are taking care of is someone close to you – that is, a family member or a partner.

However, there are caregiving tips and tricks that might help you in starting your caregiving duties and make your load a little lighter:

* Start your own copy of your senior’s medical journal. While it is extremely important for your senior to have their complete copy of medical records, it is also necessary for you to have your own “backup” copies just so you can go over them when need be and never miss a thing. Even photocopied ones count.
* Take regular breaks. Your senior won’t just drop dead if you leave them to someone else, say, one afternoon a week. This is to allow yourself sometime to rest and just do whatever you would like to do without worrying about someone else. This will save you your sanity as well. You don’t even have to leave your house if you don’t feel like it. Just have someone else to mind your senior for you during your break.
* Don’t look back. Once you’re in, the only way is to go forward. Although “wishing” may help you cope with all those disappointments and frustrations, it can also lead to more pains, so be realistic enough to accept that this is what’s happening now and there’s no way you can bring back the past.
* Seek help – even if you “remotely” need it. The feeling of not being alone on this can actually improve your caregiving days. Having someone to catch your back will surely boost your morale that no matter how hard it would be, you have someone to take charge if the situation gets too hard for you.
* Keep your legal papers in order. Surely you would like to be formally informed of your rights over your senior – and have something to show if need be. That is, if you get to decide on medical matters if and when your senior is no longer capable of doing these things. Of course it is important for your name to be written down and properly recognized by the doctor and the hospital.
* Get some love too. Never ever ignore yourself. From the everyday stress that it has been getting from caregiving, it deserve some taking care of too so never forget to give it some well-deserved r&r from time to time.

There are several reasons why many caregivers decided to just move their aging parent into their own homes instead of looking for other housing options. One of the most common factors is money. A caregiver/provider who doesn’t have much resource to go around might opt to just move a senior into their own homes and personally take care of their needs from there instead of having the senior admitted to an assistive facility. While it may seem like the most reasonable thing to do considering your situation, you might want to think about it twice as your decision may backfire and in the end, cost you a lot more.
It is important to note the amount of care your senior needs before actually moving them into your own house. If your senior can still move around on his own and do things on his own requiring little or no amount of help from others then it is quite impractical to have them move into an assistive facility and would even help them if the senior stays with their family and loved-ones. In other words, they are the most ideal parents to move into your home since they are most likely to keep to themselves and won’t require too much medical-know-how from their host family. However, if your aging parent has 101 maintenance medications that need to be administered round the clock and is dealing with medical maladies waiting to happen (seizures, etc) then it is best if you find a way to have professionals deal with your senior’s situation than be sorry later that you didn’t.
Here are some more things you must observe when moving your aging parent into your home:
· Your senior’s health. Like stated above, you need to have your senior’s health assessed to know if moving them into your home would work. If they require too much assistance then might as well let professionals handle their case.
· Money and resources. Unfortunately, money has a lot to say on your decision to move your senior into your home. Will it be cost-effective? As caring for a senior is really an expensive job. Also take into consideration the small renovations you need to do around your house to accommodate your senior as well as the other things that go along with their healthcare.
· Your own family. Are they okay with this? Did you consult them with your decision? Are they willing to help out in caring for your aging parent? Hasty decisions can sometimes lead to friction so make sure your family is all in this together.
· Support. You need all the support you can get so make sure they are within reach. Hospitals should only be minutes away from your home, friends and families who can assist you in caring for your aging parent as well as their financial needs. Also, if possible, there should be an organization or support group for caregivers near you.

Safety issues are surely not the ones you would like to discuss in Sunday dinners with your aging parents. You just don’t go straight on asking your parent if he or she has already decided on which assistive community to move into or if they have already installed the grab bars in their bathrooms. Understand that while it is important for you - as their concerned kid - to know, this makes them feel threatened – like they don’t have the capacity to decide for themselves.
Just think of it this way, when you were younger and your parents were the wiser beings, you didn’t like it too when they nag on you and tell you what to do all the time right? Just imagine what you felt and how it made you furious even if you know they were right then imagine yourself being told by your kid, that doesn’t feel really good, does it?
It is also important to start with your right foot forward just so you won’t be considered by your senior parents as the enemy in the picture. You might want to be their confidante, not the enemy as this will only make your intentions harder to do. Remember that when you are viewed as the bad guy, everything that you’ll ever say will surely be met with an argument, no matter how sensible your suggestion is. You may find your parents a little hesitant but that’s just because they are frightened.
To be able to find a common ground, better to discuss everything with an air of practicality. Your suggestion should sound as the most practical thing to do given their situation – however, they must not feel, in any way, that you consider them as a threat to their own safety.
It is also important for them to feel that they also have a say in their situation. Don’t push too hard no matter how pressing their situation is. Having a successful dialogue with your aging parent regarding their safety requires perfect timing. Allow them some time to think then ask again another time, you would know if they are ready. If you really have to make some changes now and your feel your senior is still refusing to cooperate, then seek help from people who you think they respect and believe in, like a pastor or a preacher, or their own mom perhaps? It will not be easy to make your senior “just” follow your decision since they were the ones making all the decisions for you when you were younger. What’s more important is that you earn their trust – enough trust to make them feel comfortable with your decisions over their wellbeing. Surely nobody would trust their financial woes to someone who has just filed bankruptcy, don’t you think? If you have to be in control, you must at least, act and look the part.

Just to familiarize our senior readers about psoriatic arthritis and how it is different from your ordinary arthritis, I am giving a short background description of psoriatic arthritis.

Psoriatic arthritis is an inflammatory arthritis which means aside from your usual arthritic joint aches, there would also be swelling, pitting of nails (i.e nails separating from its bed), pain in heels and soles of the feet which makes it near impossible for the sufferer to walk or stand on them. This type of psoriatic arthritis affects those with diagnosed chronic psoriasis, the skin condition.

This means that if you already have psoriasis, the skin condition, pray to God that you won’t get arthritis too since about 30% of diagnosed psoriasis patients developed the condition. And because it affects your feet, it limits mobility. While some “episodes” of psoriatic arthritis are crippling, most are manageable, in which cases, it still allows seniors to walk and stand using their feet. However, it is highly encouraged for seniors to choose their footwear wisely to prevent further exacerbation of their condition.

Here are some tips for choosing the right footwear for your arthritic feet:

* Go for sturdy designs. You need all the support you can get! Shop for footwear that is both sturdy and supportive. This way all the supporting you need doesn’t depend on your capabilities alone plus the shoes might even lend you a helping hand when you need it the most. Pay special attention particularly on the heels and balls of your feet.
* Good coverage. You might want to add some more protection to your feet against everyday hazards, well even that small pebble that usually ends up in between your toes hurts! I, personally recommend closed toes such as rubber shoes or sturdy pumps. I did some online window shopping and found some cute designs with rubber soles so that provide the coverage and support your feet needs.
* Comfort should be number one. While I recommend full-coverage shoes, this type of shoes can also be uncomfortable to wear sometimes. I do know that time can only tell if a footwear is comfortable or not but one good thing to remember when shopping for a shoe is never to depend on your “usual” size and always look for adequate cushioning. Adequate cushioning almost always guarantees comfortability.
* Proper allowance. Because of your psoriatic arthritis, expect your feet to have swellings of different levels, some days it can be moderate, or severe or none at all. To be able to accommodate these swellings, you need to have a footwear that has proper allowance – preferably half an inch on all sides. This is also why full coverage shoes are most recommended for your condition since other types of footwear requires a fit that has no allowance.