Seniors Site

The Art of Mindfulness was introduced as one of the many concepts of early Buddhism that’s still put in practice today due to its effectivity to calm the mind. In this concept, one is taught how to be conscious and aware of what the body is currently doing. It involves sensations, feelings, emotions and functions. Mindfulness techniques can teach you how to stay focused on the “now” and simplify life as it is. In western psychology, these techniques are also applied to alleviate most mental and physical conditions.

The idea behind Mindfulness is being consciously present on what is happening to your body right now and be able to disconnect yourself from all bothering thoughts of the past, future and other tidbits hidden deep within your subconscious mind. These negative thoughts are considered as stress factors and should be eliminated when practicing mindfulness. It was believed that a clear, conscious mind can help you achieve goals better than having your stressors push you everytime. Also, mindfulness yields better results since a person is deemed productive when he is mindful. However, there are some techniques in mindfulness that contradict other productivity principles.

Before adapting mindfulness into your life, you must remember that it is a kind of meditation practiced by Buddhists for centuries now. It is meant to relax your mind and free yourself of stress. It is most recommended for seniors who cannot afford anymore stress in their lives and subjecting themselves into one can even be harmful for their health. Here are some basic mindfulness techniques you can do today:

·    Avoid automatic reactions. When we do everyday tasks, our bodies immediately recognize the task hence turns on an automatic reaction to finish the task. It involves every muscle fiber in our body directly following orders from an “auto-piloted” mind. Notice how you absent-mindedly do household chores and finish it without even thinking about it or do them while your mind is wandering off to the next task. Being mindful is focusing your mind on what you do now.
·    Avoid multi-tasking at all costs. It is impossible to be mindful if there’s a barrage of whatnots going through your head. Multi-tasking is never encouraged in mindfulness. It will only confuse the mind resulting to undesirable results.
·    Worrying about the future will do you no good. If you have prepared well for it, there’s no need to worry about what the future holds. Surrender everything to the higher beings and enjoy the present moment because if it passes, it won’t ever come back.
·    Your aging body has had enough of living the fast-paced life and slowing down will certainly make your soul happy. Don’t rush through tasks in attempt to do it all at once. Give your body a chance to relax and do things at its own comfortable pace.
·    Spend time with loved-ones. I mean, REALLY spend time with them by being consciously there, absorbing every minute of it. You’ll soon realize that there’s more fun in bonding with them and appreciating the beauty of it.
·    Give yourself a quiet, 5-minute “me” time. This way, you’ll be able to rest your whole being and just relax. In a way, you’re also preparing for the next task ahead.

We say unconventional if it’s out of the ordinary, or what the society perceives as unnatural for some reason or another. Sadly, when it comes to romantic relationships, it should be within the same generation, no more no less, for it to be socially acceptable. But we all know that it’s not always the case in senior relationships. Some seniors may find themselves falling for someone half their age and the only thing that’s keeping them from taking the plunge is their doubts.

Falling inlove is a great feeling we, as humans, beg to experience even for once in our lives. When we love, it’s our hearts that rule us and it doesn’t always conform with our minds. Love certainly knows no boundaries, much less age. In addition, loving someone is not a game with certain rules to follow but it is indeed doted with challenges, more if it’s unconventional. This is what you expect in a May-December romance.

Aside from the issue of social acceptance, seniors who wish to engage in a relationship with apparent age-gap face many challenges ahead. Unlike any other regular couple out there, a relationship like this involves serious consideration and hard thinking. It is important that the senior knows exactly what he or she is embarking into and determining one’s true feelings for the other half must be realized first. Assessment is the key. The sooner you realize why you are attracted to this person, the better are your chances of a successful relationship. Ask yourself if you are willing to spend the rest of your life with this person come high or low. Are you willing to accept this person come what may? Consider the fact that you may only be experiencing empty-nest syndrome and undergoing emotional turmoil right at this very moment.

One of the hardest things to contend with in an age-gap relationship is the generation gap itself. Your generation is clearly different from the generation your partner grew up in and it is normal to find huge differences between the two. A May-December relationship requires both individuals to adjust their lifestyles depending on what’s comfortable for both of them. You need to establish that common ground for your relationship to work. It needs understanding and willingness to grow alongside each other. Don’t be afraid of changes and try other things even if it’s unusual for you.

One of the dangers an age-gap relationship may have is its ability to change a person. I put emphasis on the word danger since it is not healthy for a person to alter his life just to meet his partner’s needs. You went ahead with the relationship as a couple bearing different personalities and backgrounds. While your relationship requires certain changes, it need not change you as a person. Self-identity is the only thing you can safely take with you if and when the affair dissolves. Guard it as much as possible.

As with any other relationship, maintaining a healthy communication line is essential. It is important that you keep an open line at all times since you’ll be tackling a lot of issues especially within the first few years of the relationship.

Stress can occur anytime, anywhere and can be caused by numerous factors. In fact, stress is a very general term used if the body experiences tension and unnatural discomfort. It can be physically, emotionally and mentally or even a combination of two. But, going to work seems to be the most stressful of them all since the workplace involves ALL factors of stress.

Please be reminded that when a person reaches a certain age, the body is no longer pliable to external assaults such as stress. When stress is induced to an aging body, it will then respond differently by bringing out underlying diseases and illnesses. These conditions are considered as stress-triggered and usually don’t have any existing cure yet.

Stress in the workplace is hard to ignore. It’s always there and no matter how hard you try to leave it when it’s time to come home, it will just follow you like a shadow. The best thing to do is try to minimize the stress as much as possible. Remember that it is your health that’s at stake so you really need to do something before it gets the best of you.

TIME AND ENERGY MANAGEMENT

When at work, your mortal enemy would be time. Time can do a lot of things to a person. It can even drive you crazy if you let it be. Along with time management, you also need to learn how to manage your energy and make it last longer so you don’t have to come home tired and stressed. In energy management, you need to know when you feel productive during the day and take on jobs that are appropriate for your energy level. Take small breaks in between jobs so you don’t lose momentum without draining your body of much-needed energy. Forget multitasking, it’s not healthy for you.

THE ART OF PRIORITIZING

Prioritizing means knowing what should be done first. It involves creating a timeline for your projects which will clearly indicate what needs to be done in advance and what can be left out for later. It also involves knowing when is the right time to do some certain tasks. Timing is important, know when to attack.

ORGANIZE! ORGANIZE!

Things are done better and more efficient when they are properly organized. Organization also means knowing how to delegate tasks and be able to monitor the project’s progress. You don’t have to do everything by yourself because if you do, you’re only subjecting yourself in a lot of stress. Find the most suitable person for a certain task and let them do the work. This will give you enough space to think of other productive approaches for the project at hand.

Seniors need not be alone at the age of 60. There’s too much in life that ending it at retirement is almost a sin! Retirement is supposed to be a new leaf offering liberation and freedom from bonds that hold us down. This should be a chapter in your life when all you need to do is take care of yourself and do whatever it is that pleases you the most hence the need to stay in tiptop shape when approaching retirement.

Seniors’ lifestyle nowadays is gearing towards healthy living and staying in shape. By adapting this kind of lifestyle, they possess greater chances of enjoying their retirement since they’re able to stay active and keep up with the demands of life. Also, when a senior is healthy, it increases his or her chances of finding love again!

Maintaining a healthy lifestyle at 60 is tough and sometimes, it leaves no room for love since you tend to shuffle back and forth to doctors and other appointments. In this kind of pace, it is hard to keep up with one another since your partner is most likely be doing the same things as you are. While these activities are healthy for your own body, it is definitely not healthy for the relationship you are currently having with your chosen partner.

When seniors engage in a relationship, most of the time it is for the companionship it brings but if one is unable to fulfill this need then what’s the use of having your partner around? If your healthy lifestyle is already putting a strain to your perfect relationship then it’s time to apply some certain tricks to make “dating while staying healthy” happen.

The idea is to spend quality time with your partner whenever possible, unfortunately, maintaining a healthy lifestyle also demands a serious amount of hours per day. The trick is to combine both activities so that you are hitting two birds with one stone. Assuming that your partner is also pro-healthy, why don’t you plan an activity you can do everyday together like biking, running or jogging. You can even go to the gym at the same time your partner does. This way, you’ll be seeing more of each other everyday while doing the things you need most.

Dieting is always better when done alone but dieting with your partner is way better because you can be each other’s diet police. Also, cooking with your partner gives that romantic feel you guys most certainly need. The best part is, plan your “cheat day” together and see how sweeter it is when compared to just plain dining out.

Doctors and lab appointments? No sweat! Why don’t you guys go together and be each other’s strength in times of need or when something unexpected comes up. Sharing your life’s experiences with someone close to your heart is a very rewarding experience, like taking off a heavy baggage from your heart and letting this person help you in carrying the little of it that’s left inside. It makes life a little more bearable than normal.

Layoffs are cruel, they come at the most unexpected time and place even if you feel confident about your job right now as well as the status of your company. They can hit a workplace at any moment without warnings and it can be very difficult for affected parties. Unfortunately, it cannot be avoided even if the management prefers not to cut back on resources due to the global economic status. Layoffs are meant to be irrational and sometimes, unfair but apparently, that’s how it really goes.

Years back, the most vulnerable workers for layoffs are the inexperienced and senior citizens. Nowadays, the ax is not as picky as it once was anymore. It will hit when the need be, anytime and most certainly anywhere, be it in the lowly janitors’ closet or inside the high-powered executive’s office.

Like stated earlier, layoffs are inevitable and the work climate now is very unstable therefore it is most recommended for seniors to prepare for layoffs especially if they feel the “doomsday” is coming nearer each day. Here are some tips on how to prepare for a layoff, and hopefully you won’t have to use it ever:

·    First off, you need to take a good look into your nest egg to know what your options are. This is the only way to determine where to go when a layoff strikes. If you feel you already reached an adequate amount then you don’t have to worry about layoffs anymore, instead take it in stride by exploring other venues for your own personal growth.
·    If your nest egg is not good enough and acquiring a new job is the only option available for you then it’s time to start setting aside for an emergency fund you can use after the layoff. Your emergency fund should be able to cover you in 6 jobless-months time.
·    Before you try to save anything for rainy days, clear off any existing debts first because if you don’t, it will only eat a portion of your saved money—and more. Debts accumulate interests and these, you have to pay too on top of the principal amount owed.
·    For existing credit card debts, examine closely which card gives lower interest rates and use this as your “only” card to use for all existing debts. Credit card debts are transferable—they even call your home number just to encourage you to do so.
·    Apply money-saving strategies in your lifestyle today. Create a reasonable daily budget that uses only the basics.
·    You’ll be amazed how part-time and freelancing jobs can sustain your needs especially if you’re able to come up with regular clients and steady demand for work.
·    Know your strengths and weaknesses. There is a high demand for skilled workers nowadays and knowing where your strength lies will help you focus on it more. Improve it in any way you can and don’t let age hinder your growth as a person.
·    Being employed has its own benefits and so does layoffs. Know if you are entitled to severance pay and other benefits that come with the amount of time you served the office.

Cohabitation is when a couple chooses to live together without getting married prior to moving in. It is a mutually-agreed decision made by both parties involved and they are socially acceptable nowadays. In fact, it is considered as the best alternative for marriage since it is free of any legal bonds that come with getting married. Cohabitation is also great for “trial period” prior to getting hitched hence its nickname “trial marriage”.

For younger adults, cohabitation is great especially if things got too fast and they would rather take time to know each other more as husband-and-wife. This will also help them determine if they would be able to stay married to one another thus eliminating the legal entanglement if the relationship won’t work. In other words, cohabitation is supposedly a testing ground for the relationship’s staying power. If it hasn’t any, then you call it quits and move on.

On the other hand, cohabitation for seniors is much more than testing relationships and taking time. For seniors, cohabitation takes a whole new different meaning and sometimes, it can be heartbreaking to hear. Usually, it is not about doubting his or her partner but it’s a matter of having no choice but to stay unattached to their respective partners. Remember that these seniors belong to a generation which firmly believes in marriage and it can be doubly hard for them to defy their beliefs. Aside from that, they face criticism from their loved-ones, particularly their kids, and friends. Sadly, more and more seniors are forced to face these consequences in the name of love due to many age-related factors as evident to recent surveys. Some of which are:

·    Financial reasons. It seems that the biggest, most contributing factor for seniors to cohabitate is their finances. Some seniors see marriage as impractical or not an option for their relationship hence they prefer staying unmarried living under one roof. Then there’s the question of taxes and senior benefits that are bound to change if and when a senior decided to get married. In other cases, it is done to separate debt incurred prior to the relationship to protect the other person involved.
·    Assets. If there are assets involved, sometimes their families would step-in and interfere with the supposed marriage. To avoid this embarrassing situation, some seniors prefer to live together peacefully but without marriage than get married and have a crazy life.
·    Personal choice. It may be a bad marriage in the past that has left a bitter pill in the mouth.
·    Their own children. Older adults’ descendants play a big part on the choices they make for their own life especially if their children’s welfare is at stake.

Think Demi and Ashton or Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, they are the very epitome of successful May-December romances. These celebrities risked this road and it seems that they made the right decision after all. So, if it really works, what sets it apart from all the other relationships and what are its benefits for both individuals involved in the said relationship?

In a May-December love affair, one partner is supposed to be much older than the other one, in about 15 years or so. In a relationship wherein the man is the “much older” partner, he is well-praised by his colleagues and fairly accepted by the society. Unfortunately, the same does not go for older women and most of the time, she is tagged with different derogatory names and titles just because she was able to bag a younger male. Of the two, one can only see how hard it will be for a senior woman to engage in a May-December love affair. This is also the reason why regular senior women seldom find themselves in a situation like this, except of course if you are a celebrity like Demi whose vocabulary doesn’t include the words aging and old! But it does happen, albeit all hardships that come with it and apparently, May-December romances work better and stay longer than same-age relationships.

So, how can May-December romances work while all other types of love arrangements just stood looking on the sidelines? Because, it has the right blend of ingredients perfectly suited in this day and age. We all know how maturity works for people. It may come in a much later time and it varies greatly from one person to another. In general, girls mature faster than boys in all aspects of the body, be it physically or emotionally therefore they seek companionship of a much older partner who can satisfy their needs and be able to properly respond to their level of maturity. Relationship-wise, it is ideal if a couple could grow and mature together as the relationship progresses and enters different stages of it. Unfortunately, maturity is a thing that cannot be imposed and also, it cannot be determined. In a May-December love affairs, there’s bound to be one nurturer and one receiver hence a balanced and harmonious relationship exists. Aside from that, older adults looking to break the boring and monotonous life they are currently living find excitement in younger mates. May-December romances allow room to grow for either or both individuals and it sure does widen their horizons, making them see life through each other’s eyes. Successful relationships are almost always based on how you can extend appreciation over each other’s worth and that is exactly how May-December affairs work. Patience is also there, usually coming from the older partner’s side during the first few years but is also adapted by the younger one later on.

You’re in your midlife, she’s in her senior years, now you are having a hard time connecting to her. Does this scenario sound familiar? Probably yes, since it is a very common communication problem between a senior parent and her adult offspring.

Experts say the problem stems from the fast-paced life we seem to be leading now. Due to the demands of an average adult life, it is easy to leave your family behind, especially if they are already slowing down and are not able to keep up with the pace anymore. Even with the advances in technology today which enable us to connect with each other even if we’re miles away, it seems that it’s never enough to establish a good connection with an aging parent. Counselors recommend children of aging parents to build a good foundation, relationship-wise, early on so communication problems would be avoided later in life.

Light exchanges are highly encouraged between a parent and a child. This way you’ll be able to get to know each other more in a way that a child could determine what tone of voice to use and what words work for the parent. If you are sensitive enough, you eliminate the possibility of miscommunication. On the other hand, imposing to your parent is never good at any age and let me tell you, this is a trap most adult with aging parent fall into unconsciously. When you care about the person, you don’t impose.

It is important to share yourself too. How else can you earn trust if you cannot trust someone too? It need not be anything painful but hobbies and routines you’ve grown to love can also be shared with your aging parent to establish a common ground—a crucial part of an effective communication. Moreover, if you aim to improve your relationship which is by the way the most important step in communicating with seniors, it has to start somewhere. Shared hobby can be your easiest point of entrance. If you are unable to establish this kind of mutual relationship and time is pressing tremendously on your side, then get someone close to your senior parent whom he or she trusts with his life to act as a mediator. It will also help you if you can remember to be his child first before a life planner even if you’re the one supporting him financially right now.

When approaching a senior, never be the bearer of bad news all the time otherwise your senior will turn defensive everytime you come near. There are many things under the sun that you can discuss with your parent other than committing her to an adult care facility or submitting her to yet another lab test or even her declining health. These topics are all but depressing. Make it a habit to try cheering them up everyday.

If you are a caregiver or you have been living with a senior for quite sometime now, are you sure your senior is healthy and not on the verge of malnutrition? Sometimes seniors tend to forget about how important good nutrition is for them and just eat whenever they feel the need to, unfortunately when a senior is experiencing too much pain or is suffering emotionally, the last thing on their minds would be eating and nutrition. It now depends on their housemates to monitor their nutrition more than ever.

There are many varying factors why seniors may have overlooked their health. It can be due to the fact that some seniors live alone thus they don’t see the need to cook real food and opt to dine elsewhere. It can also be due to digestive problems which limit food choices for older adults while others find it hard to keep up with food preparation due to mobility problems. These reasons alone can tell you how vulnerable seniors are to malnutrition. Below are signs you need to look for when you are in doubt about your senior’s health:

·    Loss of appetite. When trying to determine whether your senior is eating right, don’t just ask them because if they were not, they won’t know the difference. Try spending time with the beloved senior and dine with them. Notice their appetite when served with their favorite foods as well as their reaction when invited to dine out.
·    Sudden weight loss. Drastic weight loss in a span of 3 months is not at all normal. Weight loss can be a sign of many different health conditions, emotional and otherwise. Consult a doctor immediately when you see this sign.
·    When visiting a senior, check their pantry and refrigerator just to have an idea what they have been eating these days. Check expiration dates and for spoiled foods. Throw away items that may endanger the senior’s health when mistakenly eaten and do the honors to replenish their stock with nutritional foods.
·    A dead-giveaway of malnutrition is the skin, particularly its tone. It should have healthy and hydrated look to it.
·    Positive disposition. Sudden change in the senior’s outlook in life can signify of something that others should be alarmed of. When a happy person suddenly turned lethargic and withdrawn, it’s about time you interfere.
·    Seniors with mental problems are often nutrition-neglected so do the best you can by making sure your senior gets everything his or her body needs.
·    The medications they take can also affect the way they taste foods, often making them lose appetite and do without eating altogether. When you notice this effect, discuss this with their doctor at once.

Along with aging comes physical changes that most of the time, seniors find them embarrassing to handle. Unfortunately, no matter how much we loath these changes which signify advance age, they will come. For seniors, it seems that the only thing we can do for this inevitable predicament is to delay them as much as possible, face them when they come and just make the most out of these changes. In other words, if we like to stay “likeable”, we must do damage control when the need be.

One of these physical changes that seniors suffer is dental problems. Although dental problems are not an imminent danger to one’s health, it can bring about embarrassing situations if not taken cared for beforehand. Also, it is most important for seniors to keep in touch with their dentist especially as they age further. This is because many mouth problems may indicate other underlying health problems that can be more serious and threatening to our health.

If the only thing that’s been hindering you to visit your doctor today is the fear that he or she may pull all of your damaged teeth out, then fret no more. Today, every dentist worldwide goes for restoration as they possibly could because they know all too well how a toothless grin can affect one’s self-esteem. Needless to say, a senior should not hesitate to go to his or her dentist to get the mouth job done. Here are some few good reasons why you need to see a dentist today:

·    It is common for seniors to suffer dry mouth or xerostomia. Seniors should be aware that dry mouth can cause tooth loss and other oral problems like sores, sore throat and gum disease. Dentists say that the number one contributing factor of dry mouth in older adults is the medication they take.
·    Receding gums is closely related with your weakening bones. When your jaw bones shrinks, the gums follow suit. Furthermore, gum diseases especially when they are left untreated for years now, can encourage your gums to recede in a much faster phase. This can lead to tooth loss and root decay.
·    Tooth discoloration or darkening teeth on the other hand is more of a lifestyle condition which can worsen overtime. To stay away from tooth discoloration, experts advice seniors to avoid beverages that can darken your teeth such as coffee and tea. Smoking also induces tooth discoloration.
·    Gum diseases are usually caused by our own oral hygiene. If it had been poor then your gums are now prone to gum diseases that proved to be very troublesome when they manifest. Plaques for one, can cause tooth loss to affected seniors.