Seniors Site

Is the word “cougar” new to you? Or are you still referring to the slender and agile cats roaming our mountains, always on the look out for a prey, gullible enough to fall into a cougar’s trap? Well, you must be living under a rock for quite sometime now since cougar dating must be the hottest, most liberating hype that hit the senior women’s generation!
The idea of “Older-women-dating-younger-studs” has been around for what seems like ages but apparently, the practice has reached greater heights with cougar dating. The name itself gave it a fiery spice, enough to encourage older women who are really into dating younger men to finally come out and not to be ashamed of their preferences anymore. Gone are the days when an older woman would think twice or even a hundred times before even entertaining romantic thoughts with a younger guy. With strings of successful “cougar” relationships to boast of, older women are now more confident and assured when it comes to their relationships.
For me, what really boosts cougar dating is the fact that most senior women have learned how to take care of themselves thus enabling them to age gracefully. Along with cosmetic advancements available for us to take advantage of, healthy lifestyle proves to be one of the most effective ways to look and feel younger than your age. Aside from that, older women have realized that once they reached a certain age, it should also be right time for them to start thinking about themselves and nothing else. Along with these realizations is recognizing the complexity of starting a new relationship with guys their age particularly the excess baggage they tend to bring along into the relationship. Younger guys, as we all know, don’t have these things. When they come into a relationship, they usually come alone, which is just perfect!
There are many factors why older women may fall for someone half their age. Most of the time, it’s the spontaneity the relationship brings. Somehow an older woman may feel the need to experience living the fast lane again and this, she can never get from an older guy who requires too much attention and care. Some consider it as their last hurrah in life. Others swear that it gives them vigor—a new leash in life—to break their monotonous, boring life.
Adding to these factors is the attraction it brings. For reasons unknown, younger guys may find themselves attracted to older women at some point of their lives, usually their “exploration” age when they have the highest respect for older women and would seek their wisdom and knowledge on how life works. On the other hand, older women may find themselves craving for something they have always wanted—a relationship with not much attached to it. Combine these two and you have the perfect recipe for a cougar relationship.

Although it’s quite hard to imagine a senior getting on with it, sex is still part of our lives and there’s no stopping it, come sickness and impotence! Let’s face it, it does not, in any way, dwindle as we age. Granted, there were days when sex is not as important as breathing. Who keeps an everyday-kind-of-sexual-appetite anyway? But, time and again, seniors feel the urge to do it, no matter the reasons are. I would like to think that it’s a basic human impulse—you feel it when it gets you.
Of course, if there is one thing that hinders us from having better sex, it’s our physical limitations as we grow older. For men, it is usually erectile dysfunction while in women it’s vaginal dryness. Notably, there is also a decrease in sexual drive or the so-called “libido” but more often than not, it has something to do with the way we handle ourselves or how we feel with our bodies having sex with another person. In other words, it’s our self consciousness kicking in. We all know that a large part of having sex is feeling confident of our bodies, second to that is how well we could perform and ultimately, deliver satisfaction. Problem with seniors is, they tend to dwell on these things more and forget to just have fun doing the act.
Healthy, active seniors are noted to have better sex life than those who are having health problems. This is because, physically, they are faring well and emotionally, they are confident with themselves. They, too, are not embarrassed to consult their sexual problems with doctors to enhance their sex lives. Aside from that, they are not having a hard time getting into medications to get what they want since they are physically fit and these medications pose no health risk to these seniors so far. Remember, the only key to a better life is your willingness to improve it.
Also, it helps to note that sex is viewed based on one’s gender. Men use sex as their tool toward intimacy while women use the level of intimacy to enjoy sex. This alone makes a lot of difference when we get older since seniors are more certain of what they want and need in a partner. If you would like to keep a partner satisfied especially during the golden age, start seeing sex from your partner’s perspective.
Communication plays a vital role in your sex life too. A senior must be able to communicate his fears and desires to his or her partner freely since it is the only way to make yourself comfortable and at ease while having sex. Let’s just say that during your younger years, lust reigns but now you have to give a little of yourself to be able to enjoy a better sex life.

Many longtime partners will agree, somewhere along the line, the so-called “flame” will start to flicker and for some unfortunate couples, it eventually dies down without them even knowing it. This is usually the case with seniors who will suddenly go for a divorce, shocking everyone around them, even their already grown kids. Try as they might, they won’t find the right reasons to separate since there is none to begin with, it’s just that they have been in the relationship for too long, they are already missing what it’s like to be inlove.
It’s true. It really happens. It is possible to stay in a boring relationship but it is impossible not to dream of once in a while, falling in love. I am not saying that the love is now lost for these seniors, of course it’s there. In fact, it will forever be there. How else could a person live with someone if he or she doesn’t love the other, one way or another? Staying in a relationship and staying in love, apparently, are two different things although they are closely associated. Unfortunately, falling out of love has its own catastrophic effects. One of them is infidelity.
Seniors should know that it always takes two to tango especially in a relationship. When you fall out of love, it means that your partner must be feeling the same way too. If you feel there is something “lacking” in your relationship, do consider that your partner might be noticing it too. When you start looking for love some place else, then it’s time to check on your partner as he or she may be doing or entertaining the same thoughts as well. Do take note that most affairs form when a partner starts thinking of what is lacking in his or her own relationship rather than trying to fix it.
Never let passiveness settle in your relationship. The usual problem with longterm relationships is that it is fairly easy to feel comfortable with the “arrangement”, falling into a routine, and in the process, taking for granted your partner. When you start NOT seeing your partner as a person, instead, an object or something short of being a part of the house, that’s when you know you are now being a passive partner.
Always be there for your partner. Even if you two are living together for quite sometime now and somehow, managed to build and create your own characters as a person, there’s nothing like being the person who catches their backs when they are in need. This is also the best time to reconnect with your partner and make them feel they are still special in your eyes, wrinkles and all.

In my early teens, cheating would mean “the end” of my fairytale romance. It was even considered as a sin amongst my peers and a person who cheated should be rightfully persecuted, along with the 3rd party involved. In my 20’s, cheating got a whole new meaning. It became a reason for me to break the trust and commit infidelity myself, just to get even with a partner. In my 30’s, I was wishing for the partner to commit them just to add some spice to a boring relationship or to end a miserable one. 40’s was when cheating became infidelity and indeed, a scary topic for wives as it would mean getting left behind without child support, no means to live and a two-year old in tow. While 50’s would be the decade when you finally accept that in a relationship, you are bound to get cheated, one way or another—and accept the situation with an ample sigh of resignation. After all, life goes on right? It’s just one of them bumps on the road. Arriving 60’s and beyond, this is the time when you chuckle in amazement and just leave the door open for the partner to come home either sick or dead. No matter how you look into things or how great your outlook in life, we must admit, infidelity still hurts and it molds us to what we are and what we will become. Unintentionally, it will also affect the way we connect with other people making us weary and less trusting.
Indeed, it is hard to accept infidelity, even with us seniors. When you commit infidelity, trust is put in question. Getting over infidelity is even considered as one of the most difficult things you have to go through in life. Also, when infidelity occurs, the damage is almost always directed both ways; the offending party seeking forgiveness while the offended one seeks answers as to why infidelity happened at all, often blaming themselves for their partner’s act. This is true for most long-standing relationships in which trust was already established but got broken unexpectedly.
If you find yourself stuck in a situation like this, do know that you have several choices to choose from. You can either walk away from the relationship or just accept things as they come. What matters most is that you move on from this situation with your self-respect in one piece. Never make hasty decisions, instead, find a calm place wherein you can sort things out and be able to arrive in a more acceptable judgment of the situation. While it is so easy for seniors to just drop the relationship since there will be not much to consider, do remember that some relationships deserve second chances.

Elderly romance is almost always met with a frown especially from sons and daughters and even relatives. Like medical ageism, it seems like the opposing side’s intentions are not too clear, it is just they don’t trust senior’s instinct and capabilities to decide for their own, even if their happiness is at stake.
I don’t know, but apparently, when you get older, younger people—people you’ve helped shape minds when they were younger—begin to assume the “adult” role and start deciding for you, no matter how clear your mind might be at the moment. Tables have indeed turned as seniors are most likely to find themselves sneaking out of the house to meet their “secret partners” somewhere far and secluded while enlisting friends’ help to cover up their tracks. The sad part of the story is, these interferences and resistance are sometimes not done out of their love for the concerned senior but mainly for the inheritance they are about to receive. Sad but true.
On the other hand, there are those who have genuine fears for the welfare of the seniors. These people tend to be overly protective of their senior just because they smell scam. Their fears are warranted since there were reports in which con artists victimized lonely, elderly widow. One example of which is the sweetheart scam—a heartless scam in which the con artist works his or her way into a lonely senior’s heart. Sometimes, it takes as little as gifts and personal favors, but there are those who are really after the senior’s financial reserves.
If you are one of the caregivers and you find yourself torn in such situation, please consider your parent’s or grandparent’s feelings before declaring an all out war against the blossoming relationship. Just think back when you were younger and you fight for someone you love even if everybody around you were clearly against it. It’s more or less the same. Instead of “belittling” your senior’s decisions, why not try to get to know the “partner” and see why your senior fell in love with this person, in the first place. By keeping an open mind, you’ll know what’s lacking in your senior’s life and what they wish to have. If it’s something you can give, then why not? If it’s not, then it is wise to just back off and wish them all the best, right? Bear in mind that not everything essential in life, you can provide so please give other people a chance to be happy.
Speaking for the caregivers and worried children who fearfully watch their parent go crazy in love, it is really weird to see a parent whom we considered as our champions, turning all giddy and mushy and even foolish. This sight is enough to alarm our hearts and minds if the senior is indeed in the right mind to tell whether or not the relationship is good for them so before you ward us off, please take a closer look on what apparently is amiss and ensure us that you got it all covered.

I still remember a few years back when sex in seniors was almost considered as a taboo. Even my then teenage daughter confessed to a friend—which I accidentally overheard—that there is no way she could imagine her parents having sex, even if we—i.e her parents—have been sharing a room for years and have nothing better to do during colder nights! And that was what, I was only on my midlife, not yet qualified for Medicare! Fortunately, the topic of sex in seniors, although there’s still that certain amount of embarrassment when faced in a discussion, has been slowly coming out as a normal, human behavior for older adults. I say, we should thank the internet as well for making it easier for us to come out of our shells and prove that we, too, are part of the world!
So yes, sex is present in a senior’s life, there’s no doubt about it. However, the difference between a “youthful” sex and a “mature” sex lies in one’s intention. I would like to think that sex has two aspects, the physical aspect and the emotional aspect of it. Both of which can deliver a certain level of high and satisfaction. While sex in younger people tends to be physically inclined, seniors do it to satisfy the heart—and if lucky, the body as well. In fact, seniors are more apt to have a satisfying sex since they know what they want and they usually get it from a partner.
A fulfilling sex life does not always depend on the capabilities of a partner. There should be a sexual connection; a link that connects two person in a sexual act. Without it, it can never be as enjoyable as it should be. Seniors, due to their extensive experience with life and better understanding of how sex should be, are able to fill in both shoes thus enabling them to get more out of it.
Although physical changes are to be expected during golden age, it only brings a different perspective when it comes to sex. Seniors can indeed experiment and overcome their limitations, if and when, they come to terms with these changes soon enough.  However, senior sex is no exception to safe sex rule. It was found out that the senior citizen group has an alarming, steadily-rising number of HIV infections these past few years which authorities are now taking a closer look to what’s going on before it’s too late.

Finding balance in your life is plain hard work and unfortunately, it also requires tremendous amount of effort to do so. If you have, as of the moment, a partner, family and work, you may think that setting aside ample time for yourself is quite an impossible feat and singles are indeed luckier since they don’t have family to consume their time. THINK AGAIN, according to life coaches, singles also have this kind of problem—and more!
Shockingly, it was found out that most single seniors prefer to stay single just because they fear that with their busy, crazy life now, they are not anymore capable of handling a relationship and still function as an individual, human being like they used to when they were younger. This is especially true for those who have experiences of bad marriages and domineering partners. As much as they enjoy their single comfortable lives now, they still dream of having a partner to spend the rest of their lives but refuse to accept or even acknowledge this dream.
These fears are to be understood. Single seniors usually consider their newfound freedom as a liberating experience and think that this is their time to do whatever they want, whenever they want without having someone to tell them what to do. But upon deeper probe, these single seniors are found to have developed a different outlook when it comes to relationships and self-worth, far different from what they have 20 years back!
Single seniors want their independence, more than ever. This is one thing your partner needs to understand if they want the relationship to work.  Relationship experts suggest that you make it clear to a potential partner that you value your independence early on than risk it. Your partner, especially if he or she is about your age and status, would certainly understand it.
It was also suggested for single seniors looking to form a relationship with someone at this point of their lives to plan ahead, even if there’s no partner in sight as of the moment. Planning means you need to “draft” your priorities and your limitations as well as how far you are willing to give. Of course, plans can change during the course of the relationship itself but letting your partner know these things will help clear the air of expectations. It is also best if you express what you want from a relationship.
Remember to stick to your plans if you want balance in your life. There will be situations that will test your stand and you should be able to make wise decisions. If you feel uncomfortable at any point of the relationship, don’t hesitate to lay your terms and assess the relationship from there.

While we still feel the strong urge to hold on to traditional ways of dating, somehow these new and convenient ones keep on luring us to give them a try. Most of the time, we did give it a chance and next thing we know, we’re addicted to them! That’s because they are really fun to do—even double the fun of having to do it physically during the “meet-and-greet” phase!

There are many ways on how the technology can assist us in finding a companion, internet specifically. For one, there are social networking sites where you can connect to old flames and even those whom you’re remotely interested in the past but turned out to be a total knockout! If you are keeping a blog, developing friendships through posts must not be foreign to you. In time, frequent commenters will soon attempt to take the existing relationship into new and better heights. And of course, there’s online dating sites which motives are as bright as the summer’s sky! I heard some of these dating sites are now trying to incorporate a proper dating feel by using full-sized human 3D which can go out on a date with other human 3D owners!

What I like best with online dating sites is that it eliminates first date jitters. In real life, you cannot just click your way out if you don’t like what you’re seeing. As a proper, feeling person, you are obligated to stick around until the time is up while online dating sites give you one hundred and one reasons to bail yourself out if you find your date to be offensive, if the date gets under your skin or simply not interesting enough. Somehow, online dating sites manage to keep you on the safer side and plunge only when you are totally ready. Another benefit of online dating is the convenience it gives to homebound seniors who long for friends or even someone to talk to. Remember that dating sites are there not only for romantic linkups but for finding friendships too. As long as you’re clear with your intentions in joining, I see no reason for anybody not to try them.

The downside of using online dating sites is the safety. Of course, there is no specific, proven way to know if a member is authentic or a con. In times like this, we only have our guts to rely on and nothing more. Based on my own experience, most are real people but my radars are always up when dealing with them that sometimes, it tends to be stressful and not worth it. Also, mostly it feels like a psywar where you are constantly checking for anything amiss. In general, it is easy to lie over the internet—even you can do it—the only thing that could hinder you from doing so is your conscience and we all know that there are people who don’t bother with theirs. But like they say, even in real life, it can happen so there’s not much to lose if you give it a try.

Marriage must be one of those things that cannot be hindered by age. Marriage is an ageless affair and it can be enjoyed by men and women regardless of age, the same way one can feel discontented or trapped in a loveless marriage, except of course if you are still below the marrying age. Let’s just assume that everyone who happens to be reading this material is old enough to understand what marriage really means.

Personally, it’s inspiring to see an old couple still enjoying their time together. For those who grew skeptic of fairy tales or those who have had bad marriages and got too burned to ever believe that marriages can be happier, there’s still hope. If you take a closer look at things, you’ll see that marriage is actually a two-way street and no matter how you deny having any hand in the failed marriage, it’s always you and your partner, no one else.

Of course, who wouldn’t want to grow old with someone they really love? The problem is, it is easy to fall in love and stay in love with a person who doesn’t live under the same roof that shelters your head! Disagreements start from the day this other person invades your space and privacy. In actuality, marriage is a never-ending commitment and is dotted with trivial issues which when put together bring about other totally unrelated but equally annoying disputes. This is the point when you sit down and ask yourself, where did the person you married go and who is this monster sharing your home now? To avoid a situation like this and start living a marriage that is truly worth while, there are marriage traps you need to avoid and be conscious of:

·    MARRIAGE TRAP 1: Overly critical bordering to sarcasm. Have you ever heard yourself lately when addressing issues with your partner? Why is that there’s always that sarcastic itch which badly needed to be scratched? Criticizing won’t get you anywhere. Why not try addressing the more pressing issues which compel you to be critical instead of attacking your partner personally?
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 2:  Unwarranted accusations. How easy it is to blame the other person in the house when something goes wrong! You do this mostly to divert attention from your own faults and miscalculations to the other unknowing person. Go for solutions rather than wasting energy trying to figure out who’s to blame.
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 3:  Incessant whining. Try attaching yourself to a whiny cat (or dog) for a day and you’ll soon realize how annoying it can get! It’s okay to let the other half know about the things you are currently going through but barraging him with unnecessary complaints is never going to make the marriage happier.
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 4:  Demanding too much. In other words, please don’t nag. It’s okay to remind if the spouse is starting to show early signs of dementia but nagging is only for people who are too lazy to get up and do what is needed. Also, there are better ways to let the other person know what you need without sounding like “the boss”. It’s his house too, you know.
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 5:  Bullying or malicious manipulation. As years pass, you’ll get to know more about the other person. The danger of it is letting the other person have the sword that can ultimately kill you or vice versa. If you don’t want this person to change, you shouldn’t force him to do things he wouldn’t do by himself.
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 6:  Getting even. When you feel the need for vengeful acts, it usually occupies the mind 24/7. Sadly, it leaves no room for the love that was once there.
·    MARRIAGE TRAP 7:  Ignoring what’s there for you to appreciate. Growing comfortable with each other has its own downside. For one, it is easy to overlook things, both big and small, and just see what’s lacking. You should know that in a situation like this, it is almost always your lack of appreciation that tears the marriage apart.

The internet has become as necessary as food and shelter for mankind and this includes the boomer generation. Gone are the days when seniors were afraid of the advancement in technology. They are more daring and willing to learn now, more than ever.

The embracement of technology came as no surprise for many since the internet has been providing new and efficient ways in making our lives a little easier to live. Certainly if younger generation can make use of these conveniences, why not seniors?.. In reality, it is the younger ones who encourage seniors to use computers as they will benefit from it tremendously.

Without seniors even realizing it, they have been receiving a lot from the advancement in technology. Take for example the ever-evolving medical advancement which extends lives. Without them, an aging body harassed by everyday stress can never last that long. On the other hand, one of the most important benefits the internet can give you is bridging the gap between seniors and their loved-ones who are miles away from them now—a common setup for many families worldwide.

Seniors who have learned to use computers were able to connect with their loved-ones in many ways. In popular social networking sites such as Facebook, seniors are able to get to know their grandkids better through live feeds. This kind of interaction is never possible if they will only rely on telephone conversations and letters. Also, the internet proved to be more cost-effective than any other communication means. There are tools available over the internet which provide the ease of use for elderly users. Some can even be downloaded for free. Others come with the computer itself like onscreen keyboards, magnifier and narrator.

Aside from the communication side of it, the internet can also be utilized for other things such as paying bills or buying stuff online. This alone can be of big help for seniors especially for those with mobility problems. Almost all banks do online transactions making it easier and safer for seniors to manage their bank accounts. Basic online safety measures should be applied when dealing with personal information as such. Read more about online safety here.

Communication as well as range and scope of seniors are not the only ones improved by the internet. Even socializing and potentially meeting a partner can be achieved when you finally get used to using the internet. There are hundreds of online dating sites intended for seniors and they are a surefire way to meet other seniors who are looking for love.