Seniors Site

I’ve been in the internet for such a long time that I sometimes find myself applying internet lingo to my everyday life and yes, conversations—much to the dismay of my senior friends. I won’t dare blame them, it’s really hard to keep up with how the internet speaks unless you personally experienced them. Ever encountered these words: lol, lmao and ikr? Completely, insanely incomprehensible! But for your aging mind’s information, these words stand for “laughing out loud:, “laughing my ass off” and “I know right?”. See? Simple words made difficult!
So let’s add the word “phishing” to that. I stumbled upon a very informative article in the internet this morning and like me, the author has had phishing attacks so I can totally relate to what he is saying. I decided to post his link to my social networking sites i.e Twitter and Facebook so that my friends would be forewarned of these new ways to phish. Silly me, I did not bother to check if the wordings are age-appropriate to most of my friends and I even got comments like: “What phishing?” and “What on earth?!”
Due to this, I quickly realized that not all of my senior friends are not too acquainted with most internet terms despite the fact that they use it regularly. Some may have an idea, while others just don’t care. Problem is, these are the things we really need to know when we use the internet so I took the liberty to “translate” for the senior readers what phishing is all about and how nasty it can get!
Phishing is a scam primarily made to steal your valuable information. Usually, it steals your login info and then uses it to hack your account. When you say hack, it is an unauthorized use of your account wherein the supposedly “hacker” takes full control of your account. The hacker, or the person behind it can now send mails, post images and just do whatever it is you can do with that account. In mild cases, it just uses your account to widen the phishing attack, however, your personal information is now made vulnerable, and not to mention, accessible.
I, myself, once fell for a phishing scam. This, I think, was the first batch of its kind using social networking sites. A friend mailed me a link to a video with me on it. I believed, at that time, that it really came from her since I never encountered phishing attack in a social networking site before—all I knew is that it only confines itself to emails. I clicked and was led to a log-in page which looked like the real thing. I thought it was only an error so I just faithfully typed in my details. The next day, I found out that my account sent comments and messages to my network without me knowing it. Basically, that’s how phishing works although they so often change platforms. Last I heard, they attacked Twitter and many users fell for it—seniors included.

Time and again, I post safety tips for seniors. It’s because I believe people my age are usually in dire risk in emergency situations like earthquakes and fire. Aside from that, due to limited range of motion, seniors were left behind most of the time. Although I really couldn’t blame their caregivers, considering basic human instinct to save themselves first kicking in, helpless seniors are often left to protect themselves and squeeze out of the situation in one piece! Unfortunately, only a few manage to actually do it.
Also, take note that seniors are often, masters of procrastination. Ask a group of seniors who amongst them has an emergency kit ready at home and I bet you, there will only be 1 out of 10! That’s the problem with seniors, if it’s too bad, we tend to just delay it, hoping that it will go away eventually. However, disasters, as we all know, strike at most inconvenient times—usually when we are not prepared for it—and now that different parts of the world experienced strong earthquakes with disastrous results, we should plan for it now more than ever!
Earthquake preparedness involves what a senior should do before an earthquake strikes. One of the first things you should check is how “prepared” your surroundings are, especially within places you are most likely to be found such as your office or your favorite spot in the house. Imagine yourself in case of an earthquake such as: where you should go or how to get there safely. Make sure nothing could fall on you like bookshelf or any heavy object. If these things cannot be avoided, secure them to the wall so they will not topple over. Prepare an emergency kit enough to last you three days. That’s enough time for your local government to reach and assist your with your basic needs. Your emergency kit should compose of medications, food and water, your personal needs such as canes and prescription glasses and flashlights.
During an earthquake, the only thing you should do is protect your head at all times. The rule of thumb is to dock, cover the head and hold on. The safest locations are doorframes and under a sturdy table or desk, if you can get under it without hurting yourself.  If it’s impossible to move at all, then stay where you are as it is possibly the safest as of the moment.
Right after the earthquake, stay calm and stay prepared, in case an aftershock occurs. Assess damage, if there’s any. Notify your neighbors that you are okay and if you plan to stay with them, leave a note to let people who are concerned about your safety know where you are at the moment.

Elderly romance is almost always met with a frown especially from sons and daughters and even relatives. Like medical ageism, it seems like the opposing side’s intentions are not too clear, it is just they don’t trust senior’s instinct and capabilities to decide for their own, even if their happiness is at stake.
I don’t know, but apparently, when you get older, younger people—people you’ve helped shape minds when they were younger—begin to assume the “adult” role and start deciding for you, no matter how clear your mind might be at the moment. Tables have indeed turned as seniors are most likely to find themselves sneaking out of the house to meet their “secret partners” somewhere far and secluded while enlisting friends’ help to cover up their tracks. The sad part of the story is, these interferences and resistance are sometimes not done out of their love for the concerned senior but mainly for the inheritance they are about to receive. Sad but true.
On the other hand, there are those who have genuine fears for the welfare of the seniors. These people tend to be overly protective of their senior just because they smell scam. Their fears are warranted since there were reports in which con artists victimized lonely, elderly widow. One example of which is the sweetheart scam—a heartless scam in which the con artist works his or her way into a lonely senior’s heart. Sometimes, it takes as little as gifts and personal favors, but there are those who are really after the senior’s financial reserves.
If you are one of the caregivers and you find yourself torn in such situation, please consider your parent’s or grandparent’s feelings before declaring an all out war against the blossoming relationship. Just think back when you were younger and you fight for someone you love even if everybody around you were clearly against it. It’s more or less the same. Instead of “belittling” your senior’s decisions, why not try to get to know the “partner” and see why your senior fell in love with this person, in the first place. By keeping an open mind, you’ll know what’s lacking in your senior’s life and what they wish to have. If it’s something you can give, then why not? If it’s not, then it is wise to just back off and wish them all the best, right? Bear in mind that not everything essential in life, you can provide so please give other people a chance to be happy.
Speaking for the caregivers and worried children who fearfully watch their parent go crazy in love, it is really weird to see a parent whom we considered as our champions, turning all giddy and mushy and even foolish. This sight is enough to alarm our hearts and minds if the senior is indeed in the right mind to tell whether or not the relationship is good for them so before you ward us off, please take a closer look on what apparently is amiss and ensure us that you got it all covered.

If there’s one group of people who gets classified in two contradicting characteristics, it must be the seniors’ group. Why? It is because we’re believed to be wise due to the countless life experiences we were able to gather through the years and yet, midlifers—particularly our kids–see us as gullible human beings. How on earth can a person be wise and gullible at the same time? Well apparently, or so others believe, seniors can be both.
I say, getting manipulated is not at all age-related, nor a phenomena that occurs only during the so-called golden age. Anyone can fall into someone else’s manipulative scheme if they are not too careful or they tend to easily trust what other people say. Aside from that, let’s consider the fact that most con artists pick on seniors as their prey just because these seniors are either too lonely and in obvious need of a companion or they have an amazing amount of money stashed somewhere—in some cases, both.
Sadly, there are other forms of manipulation which are not intended to snatch your pot of gold but rob your self respect. You may or may not recognize it at once but most of the time, you feel bad and really frustrated since it sort of “locked” you in a situation less desired. Manipulation occurs when someone have it their way and never bothering about you. It can be a boss who refuses to hear your opinions, instead, adamantly insists on doing things to his liking, or it can be a friend who always calls during ungodly hours just to have a chat with you, mostly to tell you her latest adventures.
What seniors should know is that, master manipulators actually size up their potential prey prior to moving in for the kill. In other words, they try to gauge the opposite person if they can be manipulated or not. With that said, you should be conscious enough of your actions and try to create an impression that you are not the type they are looking for. Here are the usual warning flags that you should avoid:
·    Being passive. You just let everything pass you by, even if they are annoying. You don’t acknowledge your true feelings just because you hate confrontations and are afraid that someone might get hurt.
·    Allowing others to control your life. You just go with the flow. You let someone else move you to places. You never decide for yourself.
·    Afraid of your own opinions. You get all nervous just by the thought of opening your mouth and having your say on important issues.
·    Fickle-minded. When you jump from one decision to another and then back again even without strong and apparent reason, it expresses your inability to make strong judgment.
·    Approval seeker. One strong sign of insecurity.
·    Not valuing one’s self. If you love yourself, you know that there are some people who are just not worth your time and effort.

National Fire Data Center has released their figures and data pointing out that older adults are indeed at risk when there’s fire. The staggering numbers do say it all! See full report here.
It was found out that at age 65, a senior doubles his or her risk of dying in a home fire and triples it when he reaches the age of 75. Sad facts but true, but what’s clear and evident in this study is seniors are never safe even in their own homes. This is especially true for those who have limited range of motion or those who are no longer capable of caring for themselves.
Some of the reasons why fires occur in a senior’s home were pointed out in their report. These are: smoking, ignited furniture or bedding, and cooking. If we are to connect the dots in this report, it’s fairly easy to see that it all boils down to carelessness. Either that, or memory gap, choose your pick. As to the reason why most seniors with homes afire never made it out alive is partly blamed to the “unpreparedness” of the victim.
If “don’t play with fire” works for children, we seniors should also heed the call, that is if we aim to live longer lives and not be burnt to a crisp! Reaching a certain age when we feel we are easily distracted and forget activities soon after we are engaged in the next one should make us realize that fire and flames instantly become a threat not only to our lives but also to our families. Be aware of your movements when starting a fire, never leave it blazing and kill it off as soon as you’re ready to move on to your next chore will help you tremendously in avoiding fires. Here are some tips on how to fight off the fire risk:
·    Always keep your emergency kit near you. When going to bed, put it right beside you where you can easily grab it on your way out. Your emergency kit should include:  your glasses and flashlight, medications, etc..
·    Avoid smoking while in a position that is prone to you falling asleep i.e lying down. It was found out that cigarettes are the common cause of an ignited furniture or bedding, with the senior on top of it!
·    NEVER, NEVER leave a stove or even the oven open. If you need to go out of the kitchen, turn everything off or yell for someone to watch it for you. No ifs, no buts!
·    Install fire detectors especially to areas that are considered as high-risk.
·    Have a water sprinkle attached with the fire detector so it could easily put the fire down while manageable.

One of the worst things that can ever happen to a senior is when they are forced to give up their privacy just because they are no longer capable of caring for themselves. In fact, it stays as the number one reason why seniors give their loved-ones a hard time when pursued to have themselves moved to assisted living facilities or even have someone to care for them in their own homes such as home care. Aside from the apparent reason of compromising one’s “ego”, what these younger people don’t understand is that losing our privacy contributes immensely to the very stressful situation.

But, whether we like or not, we have to admit that we are no longer safe when left alone. Especially if our aging bodies are already harboring one hundred and one life threatening illnesses that are bound to attack anytime. Most of these illnesses do not manifest ahead of time nor give warning when it’s due. They just happen, worst, they happen when nobody is around to attend to us. With that said, we know that in order to prolong our lives, we must act fast in making our dilemmas meet half way.

Some blog posts ago, we’ve discussed how technology was able to help seniors solve part of their problems. There were pendants and belt-clipped devices that can alert a nearby person that the wearer is in dire trouble with just a push of a button. Although these devices were able to save seniors from greater danger, it failed to steer seniors away from dangerous situations altogether.

Good news is, many manufacturers are now moving in for the kill! The new and improved alert devices that were merely a loud, buzzing speaker can now do so much more! According to sources, it can now answer the phone, remind the senior when it’s time to take meds and even prepare the medicines to be taken when it’s time. Other uses include alerting the wearer when there’s fire or intruder in his home. It also has motion detector that monitors the senior’s movement and studies the wearer’s activity pattern such as sleep and walk. It can also be programmed to work with other devices that the senior or the monitoring facility may have.

Seniors who are able to experience first hand these high tech devices swear by them. It was reported that having one gives them added protection and security which enabled them to stay at home by their own. Health care providers encourage seniors to try these devices if they opt to stay at home without any supervision.

Even if this post is titled as such, it doesn’t mean that seniors are manipulative people. On the contrary, they are most vulnerable in the hands of predators who are always on the look out for the perfect prey—unfortunately, they see the senior group as one of the easiest to manipulate since most seniors are very trusting in nature.

Generally speaking—and sadly enough—manipulation exists everywhere! A senior can find them prevalent in workplace and even in your own home, with your own defenses down, it may be present. It can be just about any other person, no matter the extent or degree of relationship. These people take advantage of the “first encounters” as these usually are void of any defensive feelings.

Whether seniors like it or not, the world is not a perfect place. It has its own faults. We, on the other hand, would like to believe that it is indeed perfect as it would be much easier to live in it if it were. Meanwhile, manipulation happens for one reason: for selfish satisfaction—and some people are really good at this, you wouldn’t even know you’re being manipulated. Manipulative people share certain characteristics. These are their common denominator, a way to spot them. If you spot these ahead of time, you’ll be able to extract yourself from the situation and be forewarned with any future dealings with this person hence saving you from falling for their scams and schemes.

CHARACTERISTIC 1:  Compliments, compliments, compliments. What better way to make someone move to desired direction than showering them with compliments, unwarranted and otherwise? This is especially true for seniors who longed to be appreciated but their loved-ones failed to do so.

CHARACTERISTIC 2:  Guilt-tripper. An experienced manipulator will know your weaknesses. If you’re the kind of person who would not want to be blamed for anything hence always doing your share of work then a guilt-tripper is your worst kind of manipulator. He’ll make you do things just because you have to, not because you like what you are doing.

CHARACTERISTIC 3:  Nagger. This person will pester you until you give in just to shut them up. It’s quite hard to say “no” to these people without hurting their feelings but once you gave in, they’ll pester you again tomorrow so its better to clear rules now and ask questions later.

CHARACTERISTIC 4:  A bully. Bullying is an art perfected in grade school. Through the years, expect a bully to continually hone their craft and get what they want from people. They may be tough but you, as your own person, deserve to do whatever you want and not get orders from someone else. Besides, it’s about time they do their own work.

It’s been a while since I last posted about seniors falling to fraudulent schemes. It’s a given fact that seniors are the usual targets of scams and personally, I take offense on that. I only take refuge in the fact that maybe these unscrupulous people who are after a senior believe we have money hidden somewhere and not because we are gullible human beings—easy enough to handle.

I still believe that in order to protect a senior from scams, we need to educate ourselves from scammers’ usual activities. Keeping up with current events by merely watching news and reading papers can definitely warn us thus preparing us if and when the situation hits us. If you are fairly active with the internet i.e if you check your emails daily and connect with your loved-ones using social networking sites, it pays big time to check new and inventive ways these scammers use. The internet community has always been helpful in alerting us when there’s a new, fast-spreading scam within the circle. For one, Facebook management gives out updates and reports regularly, so when they do, make sure you read it.

One of the hardest to handle is unsolicited phone calls. Telemarketers are trained to be persistent, bordering to annoying. Also, before they call your home, they already did their homework, knowing every minute detail they can scrape about your character. What makes it scarier is that this kind of calls is never random, in fact they are targeted, making you exposed and vulnerable. The best way to handle this situation is to simply hang-up. No need to fret over being rude, just remember that this person who is calling you has no right to come snooping on you. Think of it as simply returning the favor. Being nice to them is simply encouraging them to call back—and that, they will certainly oblige.

Another easy way for scammers to invade your life is through mails. My advice is to not bother opening mails you don’t expect to be coming your way, no matter how tempting the envelope may be. Throw them straight to the thrash can where they truly belong. Personally, I’m amazed how my mails seem to grow right along with my age! Also, be doubly aware of credit card charges and bank balances. If this task is getting harder to accomplish each day, get someone to do it for you. Just make sure this person can be held liable and can be sued if there’s a discrepancy in records.

I also find it annoying to have someone knocking on my door and persisting to come and check something. First off, I don’t like strangers coming in my home, ever, and you should do too. Second, I don’t like someone telling me there’s something wrong with my house especially when I don’t see anything wrong with it, again, you should do too. If you need to get your home repaired, you come to them, not the other way around, no matter how convenient the arrangement seemed to be.

This is probably the most horrible news one could ever receive but unfortunately, senior abuse is not at all uncommon and they really do happen—a lot. No matter where you choose to leave your senior, there will always be a chance of them getting abused without you knowing it. What’s most painful is that the trust that was once there is now broken. Not to mention the trauma your senior must have acquired during the whole ordeal. Indeed, an experience like this striking any family is something we all have to avoid at all cost.

But how would you know? In rare occasions, a senior may report these cases themselves to proper authorities but again, this is not always the case. Usually by the time an abuse case concerning a senior reaches the police, it’s way too late. Reasons for not reporting vary widely from one senior to another, the most common of which are the inability of the senior to do things on his own and poor judgment to matters concerning their own welfare. Some of them admitted to authorities that they were either ashamed or too frightened to call for help even if they already did recognize danger. Most reported cases of senior abuse came from concerned neighbors and close friends who are quick to identify these warning signs.

Regular contact with your senior is the most effective way to prevent abuse from happening. If other people are aware that you have been checking regularly, they will think twice before doing something bad. It will also be for your senior’s best to check up on their affairs once in a while especially their finances which apparently is the most vulnerable—and very targetable—area of their life right now. Here are some of the most common warning signs that you should be looking for when you suspect senior abuse:

·    Discrepancies in their financial affairs and assets. Unscrupulous people will try to “milk it” as long as they stay undetected. They will apply tactics and other methods of persuasion just to get their hands on the senior’s money.
·    Signs of malnutrition. When you notice they are dropping weight like crazy then it’s time to intervene. When a person loses weight, there’s always something wrong with the picture, either he is not getting enough food to nourish his body or he is not receiving proper medical care while the body takes in all the blow.
·    Physical injuries or telltale signs of physical abuse. Take note of bruises, cuts, welts and broken bones. While it is normal to acquire these things when doing everyday chores, they should be explainable.
·    If your senior is living with someone who abuses them, your senior is bound to exhibit a different kind of attitude whenever that person is around. Also, signs of emotional withdrawal is noted when a senior is subjected to abuse.

Imagine driving almost your entire lifetime, dodging every traffic ticket there is, knowing the road even if you drive blindfolded and virtually conducting your everyday tasks and jobs inside your car. As an evidence, one look inside your old, trusty car and one would know what kind of business you’re running nowadays. Above all these, the connection between you and your car have grown through the years and come to think of it, your relationship with your car even surpassed that of your first spouse! If you feel this way, then you’re certainly not alone for there are thousands of senior drivers unable to will themselves away from their cars and would rather drive even if the situation has become more dangerous for them to do so.

There have been several posts in this blog about safe driving for seniors but nothing beats a refresher course conducted by the experts. Due to many road incidents concerning senior drivers, and also the great concern expressed by their family and friends, organizations who look after the welfare of older adults are now moving to make the road a safer place for seniors nowadays. We all know how age-related physical changes can affect one’s driving skill, no matter the amount of years-experience they acquired. Not only are these seniors putting themselves in a very dangerous situation but also they pose a great threat to pedestrians, other drivers and the road in general. This is how important a refresher course is to driving seniors.

Various organizations such as AAA, and AARP offer materials, seminars and short courses to assist driving seniors and hopefully make them “fit for the road” once again. There are also online courses for those who are unable to physically make it to classes and workshops and it was said to be as helpful and accurate as the ones taught in classes. However, class instructors encourage seniors to participate in real classes since it provides interaction between the instructor and the student. Included in these classes are age-appropriate and defensive driving tips that are perfectly suitable for seniors. Also, instructors encourage seniors to accept their limitations early on to avoid difficult situations from happening.

Driving schools are now offering refresher courses that actually put seniors behind the wheel to show them how to properly drive and work with their limitations such as changing lanes or staying in appropriate speed lanes. Some programs go as far as evaluating the driver medically for easy-spotting of problems. Most organizations offer them for free while others can go as high as $20.